HELLO FRIENDS!

Friday, July 30, 2021, is the INTERNATIONAL DAY OF FRIENDSHIP. I am very fortunate in my life to have friends who are family and family who are friends. My circle is small but mighty. I never knew how mighty until my cancer returned, and I was finally brave enough to let them in.

My first go with cancer I kept it close to my chest. Being fiercely independent and private I wasn’t ready to share my diagnosis with many. Just a small trusted few. Then I was pushed gently into therapy by my Oncologist. I am so grateful for that push to get me out of my comfort zone.

After 6 years of individual therapy and 4 years of group therapy at Gilda’s Club Simcoe Muskoka I learned the power of sharing my story. Not only to help others but to help myself.

That was never clearer until when my cancer returned. I decided it was time to let more people in. I needed their support. It was hard to ask and even harder to share but I am so glad I did. my Gilda’s Club Simcoe-Muskoka Cancer Community gave me guidance and hope. My circle of friends I renamed to be My People rallied around me lifting my spirits and sending me love every day.

When you go through something life-altering you really discover who your people are. Some are not a surprise; they are your constant always. Some come out of nowhere and shock you with their kindness and friendship. Then there are those who disappoint you.  

This is a tough one. I have experienced this, and it has broken my heart.  I have also had time to reflect, with therapy and conversations with my people. Sometimes people just can’t hang. They want to help but they don’t know how. OR they are going through their own sh*t so they don’t have the capacity to be there for you. OR they just don’t want to. Sometimes people change. You change. Friendship changes. Sometimes people aren’t able to give you what you need.

As hard as it is to lose “one of your people” it also makes you appreciate the ones who did stick by you. The ones who knew what you needed even when you didn’t. The ones who reached out at exactly the right time or said the exact right thing. Or the ones who just listened and helped you work really tough things like your funeral or who will look after your boy or your Mom if you are no longer here. The ones who give you comfort because they love you as much as you love them. Those are your people. Cherish them always, you don’t need a special day to do it, life is short, do it always.

Follow me on my social @JAYEMBarrie for my POSTS, REELS, and IGTV, or check out my website www.jayem.ca to stay informed on what I am doing. Follow my Pinterest for great quotes and lots of other informational items. Share your questions or comments either in the comment box of my Instagram posts or in a DM.  Please note: I am not an expert or professional in the field of cancer. I am simply someone who has gone through it and living with it, doing my best to offer you my experience and advice in hopes that it helps.